We departed from Amsterdam, bound for Paris in rather a rush, finding out with 6 minutes to spare that we needed to change platforms and catch a train to the airport, and then find our train to Paris. Apparently, no-one in Europe believes that people need to be informed (in a timely fashion or otherwise) when a train is cancelled. Nor do they need to be given a reason. I hate to think what would have happened if we hadn't have been there early, or if we hadn't moved immediately to our platform when it appeared on the board. Thankfully, the remainder of the journey was uneventful.
Day one kicked off with a trip to Trocadero, giving us an amazing view of something called the Eiffel tower, perhaps the most under-rated landmark on the Parisian skyline. They should really market that a bit more - it would do wonders for their ailing tourist numbers.
Anyway, we made our way towards it, only to discover that a ridiculously long line had already been established beneath the tower (at ten in the morning!). We waited our turn, jumped on the first elevator, and headed up to the first floor.
Here of course, the view was already pretty amazing, but we thought it best to wait another hour to ascend to the very top. Neither Zach or I had actually been to the very top floor of the Eiffel tower, so it was a very cool experience.
We then headed down to the Champs De Mars for a quick photo stop, where we were asked by no fewer than 37 people to take their picture. Unfortunately, in every country we appear to be a very popular photography option. I think it might be because Zach has kind of this David Attenborough look about him. No group was more annoying in terms of asking for their picture taken than the five South Africans teens who insisted Zach get a photo of them jumping in front of the Eiffel tower. Despite 10 minutes of attempts, they still didn't manage to get a photo where they were all actually off the ground. I never realised how difficult it is to jump on "3, 2, 1, JUMP!" before. In any case, we took a couple of pictures and then headed onwards.
Musee de l'Orangerie was our next stop, just off Place de la Concorde. It was a museum full of all the kinds of art Zach and I hate, but we mainly went to see one thing. A collection of eight "water lily" paintings by Monet, who is apparently pretty big. I find this hard to believe, because Zach and I both agree that in 5/8 cases, Theo (the newest addition to the Mansfield family) could produce a more exciting work of art. Three decent paintings out of eight is not a good batting average. Especially when, like Monet, you can't even paint within the lines (he left paint all over the pre-installed frames). I would show you photos, but 10 Euro is not enough to buy the rights to photograph this stuff, apparently.
After leaving the Musee, we hightailed across town just in time to scale the Arc de Triomph and catch a daylight view of the surrounds. It was breathtaking, but boy is that climb a killer. The worst of the European climbs by far!
The next day began with a bang in the form of BLUE SKY!!!! I cannot begin to explain my excitement. You don't realise how much you love the colour blue until you suffer through weeks of continuous grey. We headed to the stunning Paris Opera house, and with the weather co-operating, finally managed to get some photographs that don't look like they were taken in grey sepia.
Next stop was Les Invalides, home to the Army museum and Napoleon's tomb. It was a massive tomb for such a small man. The gigantic porphyry coffin sits in a two-storey, round marble room decorated with sculptures, paintings, and more importantly, the name of some of the major battles won by Napoleon. Non-surprisingly, this did not feature the Battle of Waterloo. Despite this, it's still a pretty decent place to have earthly eternal rest, if you ask me.
Speaking of grand tombs, the Parisian Pantheon was our next stop. Like the Pantheon in Rome, it was an exceptionally beautiful building, both inside and out.
It is famous for two things: one, an astronomical pendulum which keeps the time, and two, an outstanding number of famous frogs - French people, not the amphibian. Those of note include Marie Curie (Zach remarked that he hoped they had deradiated her tomb):
Also Alexandre Dumas, Voltaire, Victor Hugo, and Louis Braille (who also has his name written in you guessed it - Braille - outside his tomb. Nice touch - pun intended).
Moving on, it was only a short walk and a long wait in line to the Cathedral at Notre Dame from the Pantheon. Made famous by Victor Hugo and popularised by Disney, Notre Dame is a lovely old Cathedral with a massive bell tower, of which most of the bells are currently non-operational.
After waiting for seven years to be allowed to climb to the top of the spire, we finally were allowed through into a narrow spiral staircase. With no platforms on the way up, we passed many people who had decided to stand and catch their breath before proceeding. This included (and was limited to) numerous fat Americans. They were difficult to pass due to basic physics - one fat American blockade on one skinny French staircase = major traffic jam. Zach was forced into crawling like a jooule (dog) on all fours for part of the way. In spite of this, the view from the top was fantastic, especially on the lower level (the one surrounded by the gargoyles).
Though late in the day, we decided to make a stop at Hotel de Ville, famous due a picture of two amorous youths getting their mack on in front of it. It is a VERY beautiful old building, made more so by the night lighting around it.
The massive ice-skating rink somewhat detracts from its beauty, but not-so-secretly laughing at victims with two left skates does not. From there it was back to the Arc de Triomphe to get some night photos of the surrounds. This of course meant another gruelling climb up the Arc, made worse by the fact that we were attempting to reach the top before the hourly Eiffel light show kicked into gear. Now, I won't give exact times, but I will say that the time in which we reached the Arc roof from Hotel de Ville defies multiple laws of physics. A fact that all four of our legs (having already scaled Notre Dame) will attest to. Protip: Do not attempt to run up the Arc de Triomphe. You will die in the legs. Anyway, the view was breathtaking, and Eiffel sparkled away magnificently as expected.
Funny moment from this night - when we had climbed down the Arc and were about to leave, we noticed that a crowd of veterans and young soldiers had gathered near the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier underneath the Arc for some sort of ceremony.
We stood aside and watched for a while. All of a sudden, the band burst into song. I listened intently - why, they had begun playing the Brisbane Lions club song! "Hey Zach", I enquired, "Why are they playing the Brisbane Lions song?"
Zach: "Uhm, that's the French National Anthem".
...
Epic laughter.
We awoke SUPER early the next day with two things in mind - the Louvre and Musee d'Orsay. I was informed by Zachary that one or two people like to visit the Louvre, and that just to be safe, we should arrive over an hour early to beat the lines. Two problems: It was rather cold/wet AND there were already people in the line, making our early rise moot. We lined up nonetheless, and waited in misery for the opening. During our wait, Zach hatched our game plan - we were going to run for the Mona Lisa and hog her. Incredulous, I declared that there was no way I would run to the Mona Lisa. How silly, I thought. I don't care if other people are in my pictures, and I don't want to make myself look desperate. However, when those doors opened, boy did I put the pace on. All of a sudden, I felt competitive - cloak rooming the umbrella was an annoyance, as was slow people on one-wide escalators. We raced past corridors of the most important artwork in history, and into Mona's rather unhumble abode. Seriously, she is tiny, but she has her own wall in a ridiculously large room. It's actually rather amusing. There is something special about that painting though… you just want to stare and stare, though you are unsure why.
After getting some great one-on-one photographs, we set about seeing all of the amazing things we missed on the way to Mona. Favourites included:
- The Big Three: Paintings of the Wedding feast at Cana, Coronation of Napoleon, and Liberty Leading the People (amazing in sheer size and detail)
- Anything Raphael touched
- David and Goliath by Daniele da Volterra (An incredible double sided painting which allows you to see the battle from the front and the rear)
- A quad of paintings by Giuseppe Arcimboldo (See Australian government's 2+5 ad campaign for more [plagiarised] information)
- Antonio Campi's "Les Mysteres de la Passion du Christ"
- Apollon et Daphne (Francesco Albani - this one is a favourite of mine)
- Some absolutely incredible "painting within a painting" works by a man named Pannini
- Psyche and Cupid (my favourite sculpture of all time), and "The Dying Slave" by Michelangelo. We only wish there had been more Bernini - number one fans right here!
We also checked out some really cool Egyptian relics - Sphinxes, Sarcophagi, Hieroglyphics and such. Incredible.
After a quick break for exterior photography, it was on to the Musee d'Orsay. Before we entered the museum, we saw the infamous gold ring scam be attempted by a filthy French scammer (where the scammer drops a ring in front of an unsuspecting person, acts like the ring belongs to the person so as to play upon the person's greed when he offers it to them, and then ask for money after the greedy target has accepted the ring). The two targets bluntly told him to "F*ck off", which we both found amusing.
Upon entry to the Musee, I was informed that absolutely no photography was allowed. Completely sick of paying a small fortune to get into these establishments, I proceeded to spend the next few hours taking photos of anything I bloody well felt like. This included paintings by Monet, Degas, and Van Gough to name a few.
The next day we travelled to the Palace at Versailles. Versailles is not far outside of Paris and was easy to walk to from its closest train station.
It didn't take long to clear security before being let into the main part of the Palace, the State Apartments. The French really knew how to decorate a room. Lavish rooms gilded with all kinds of precious metals, different painting styles, amazing furniture. We spent a couple of hours walking through the King's bedrooms, official staterooms, and the apartments of Marie Antoinette. We were disappointed that we couldn't get into the Dauphin's apartments, but oh well - you win some, you lose some. We walked through the famous "Hall of Mirrors", which is lined with - you guessed it - mirrors! The king must have been pretty vain. Even so, it was very lovely to see.
Leaving the main part of the Palace, we headed out into the vast expanses of garden to seek Marie Antoinette's estate at the rear of the palace grounds. It was a bit of a hike, and Zach was disappointed when I was not keen to hire a golf cart with him to drive from the Palace to the Estate.
It took just over half an hour before we arrived at the Grand Trianon, the recreation quarters for the Royal family, and the Petite Trianon, where Marie Antoinette spent much of her time. It's hard to find a space that isn't elaborately decorated on the walls and ceilings.
We left Versailles and headed back into Paris, up to Sacre Coeur and Montmartre where the Basilica of the Sacred Heart of Paris sits. It's a beautifully designed church which becomes even more beautiful at twilight.
We walked to the Moulin Rouge and took some pictures with its facade, before finally heading home for the night.
The next day was our last morning in Paris. We headed to the famous Parisian Catacombs which open near Denfert Rochereau metro station in the South of Paris. Inside the catacombs are the bones of up to six million Parisians who died after contagious diseases such as the plague spread throughout the city hundreds of years ago. Because this was our last day in Paris and we had to catch the Eurostar at 2pm, Zach had the bright idea that we should turn up to the entrance an hour before it opened (as apparently the lines for the catacombs can stretch around the block). We woke up exceedingly early, made our way to Denfert metro station, and lo and behold -
- there was nobody at the catacombs when we arrived. It was another twenty minutes before the second person in line showed up.
The catacombs are about 100 steps underground, and apparently span hundreds of kilometres (though there are only two kilometres open to the public). The bones have been arranged in patterns, most of which make up the walls that line the catacombs, but some are designed in elaborate vaselike formations, or are incorporated into the designs for bone altars for worship and such.
Spooky. It was dark and wet down there, but I'm very glad we did it. It's definitely not for those who are claustrophobic.
London next!
Day one kicked off with a trip to Trocadero, giving us an amazing view of something called the Eiffel tower, perhaps the most under-rated landmark on the Parisian skyline. They should really market that a bit more - it would do wonders for their ailing tourist numbers.
Anyway, we made our way towards it, only to discover that a ridiculously long line had already been established beneath the tower (at ten in the morning!). We waited our turn, jumped on the first elevator, and headed up to the first floor.
Here of course, the view was already pretty amazing, but we thought it best to wait another hour to ascend to the very top. Neither Zach or I had actually been to the very top floor of the Eiffel tower, so it was a very cool experience.
 |
| View from La Tour Eiffel towards North West Paris (Trocadero bottom left, Arc de Triomph upper middle) |
We then headed down to the Champs De Mars for a quick photo stop, where we were asked by no fewer than 37 people to take their picture. Unfortunately, in every country we appear to be a very popular photography option. I think it might be because Zach has kind of this David Attenborough look about him. No group was more annoying in terms of asking for their picture taken than the five South Africans teens who insisted Zach get a photo of them jumping in front of the Eiffel tower. Despite 10 minutes of attempts, they still didn't manage to get a photo where they were all actually off the ground. I never realised how difficult it is to jump on "3, 2, 1, JUMP!" before. In any case, we took a couple of pictures and then headed onwards.
Musee de l'Orangerie was our next stop, just off Place de la Concorde. It was a museum full of all the kinds of art Zach and I hate, but we mainly went to see one thing. A collection of eight "water lily" paintings by Monet, who is apparently pretty big. I find this hard to believe, because Zach and I both agree that in 5/8 cases, Theo (the newest addition to the Mansfield family) could produce a more exciting work of art. Three decent paintings out of eight is not a good batting average. Especially when, like Monet, you can't even paint within the lines (he left paint all over the pre-installed frames). I would show you photos, but 10 Euro is not enough to buy the rights to photograph this stuff, apparently.
 |
| Picture kindly donated by Wikipedia |
 |
| View of the Champs-Élysées from atop the Arc |
The next day began with a bang in the form of BLUE SKY!!!! I cannot begin to explain my excitement. You don't realise how much you love the colour blue until you suffer through weeks of continuous grey. We headed to the stunning Paris Opera house, and with the weather co-operating, finally managed to get some photographs that don't look like they were taken in grey sepia.
Next stop was Les Invalides, home to the Army museum and Napoleon's tomb. It was a massive tomb for such a small man. The gigantic porphyry coffin sits in a two-storey, round marble room decorated with sculptures, paintings, and more importantly, the name of some of the major battles won by Napoleon. Non-surprisingly, this did not feature the Battle of Waterloo. Despite this, it's still a pretty decent place to have earthly eternal rest, if you ask me.
Speaking of grand tombs, the Parisian Pantheon was our next stop. Like the Pantheon in Rome, it was an exceptionally beautiful building, both inside and out.
It is famous for two things: one, an astronomical pendulum which keeps the time, and two, an outstanding number of famous frogs - French people, not the amphibian. Those of note include Marie Curie (Zach remarked that he hoped they had deradiated her tomb):
Also Alexandre Dumas, Voltaire, Victor Hugo, and Louis Braille (who also has his name written in you guessed it - Braille - outside his tomb. Nice touch - pun intended).
Moving on, it was only a short walk and a long wait in line to the Cathedral at Notre Dame from the Pantheon. Made famous by Victor Hugo and popularised by Disney, Notre Dame is a lovely old Cathedral with a massive bell tower, of which most of the bells are currently non-operational.
After waiting for seven years to be allowed to climb to the top of the spire, we finally were allowed through into a narrow spiral staircase. With no platforms on the way up, we passed many people who had decided to stand and catch their breath before proceeding. This included (and was limited to) numerous fat Americans. They were difficult to pass due to basic physics - one fat American blockade on one skinny French staircase = major traffic jam. Zach was forced into crawling like a jooule (dog) on all fours for part of the way. In spite of this, the view from the top was fantastic, especially on the lower level (the one surrounded by the gargoyles).
Though late in the day, we decided to make a stop at Hotel de Ville, famous due a picture of two amorous youths getting their mack on in front of it. It is a VERY beautiful old building, made more so by the night lighting around it.
The massive ice-skating rink somewhat detracts from its beauty, but not-so-secretly laughing at victims with two left skates does not. From there it was back to the Arc de Triomphe to get some night photos of the surrounds. This of course meant another gruelling climb up the Arc, made worse by the fact that we were attempting to reach the top before the hourly Eiffel light show kicked into gear. Now, I won't give exact times, but I will say that the time in which we reached the Arc roof from Hotel de Ville defies multiple laws of physics. A fact that all four of our legs (having already scaled Notre Dame) will attest to. Protip: Do not attempt to run up the Arc de Triomphe. You will die in the legs. Anyway, the view was breathtaking, and Eiffel sparkled away magnificently as expected.
Funny moment from this night - when we had climbed down the Arc and were about to leave, we noticed that a crowd of veterans and young soldiers had gathered near the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier underneath the Arc for some sort of ceremony.
We stood aside and watched for a while. All of a sudden, the band burst into song. I listened intently - why, they had begun playing the Brisbane Lions club song! "Hey Zach", I enquired, "Why are they playing the Brisbane Lions song?"
Zach: "Uhm, that's the French National Anthem".
...
Epic laughter.
We awoke SUPER early the next day with two things in mind - the Louvre and Musee d'Orsay. I was informed by Zachary that one or two people like to visit the Louvre, and that just to be safe, we should arrive over an hour early to beat the lines. Two problems: It was rather cold/wet AND there were already people in the line, making our early rise moot. We lined up nonetheless, and waited in misery for the opening. During our wait, Zach hatched our game plan - we were going to run for the Mona Lisa and hog her. Incredulous, I declared that there was no way I would run to the Mona Lisa. How silly, I thought. I don't care if other people are in my pictures, and I don't want to make myself look desperate. However, when those doors opened, boy did I put the pace on. All of a sudden, I felt competitive - cloak rooming the umbrella was an annoyance, as was slow people on one-wide escalators. We raced past corridors of the most important artwork in history, and into Mona's rather unhumble abode. Seriously, she is tiny, but she has her own wall in a ridiculously large room. It's actually rather amusing. There is something special about that painting though… you just want to stare and stare, though you are unsure why.
After getting some great one-on-one photographs, we set about seeing all of the amazing things we missed on the way to Mona. Favourites included:
- The Big Three: Paintings of the Wedding feast at Cana, Coronation of Napoleon, and Liberty Leading the People (amazing in sheer size and detail)
- Anything Raphael touched
- David and Goliath by Daniele da Volterra (An incredible double sided painting which allows you to see the battle from the front and the rear)
- A quad of paintings by Giuseppe Arcimboldo (See Australian government's 2+5 ad campaign for more [plagiarised] information)
- Antonio Campi's "Les Mysteres de la Passion du Christ"
- Apollon et Daphne (Francesco Albani - this one is a favourite of mine)
- Some absolutely incredible "painting within a painting" works by a man named Pannini
- Psyche and Cupid (my favourite sculpture of all time), and "The Dying Slave" by Michelangelo. We only wish there had been more Bernini - number one fans right here!
We also checked out some really cool Egyptian relics - Sphinxes, Sarcophagi, Hieroglyphics and such. Incredible.
After a quick break for exterior photography, it was on to the Musee d'Orsay. Before we entered the museum, we saw the infamous gold ring scam be attempted by a filthy French scammer (where the scammer drops a ring in front of an unsuspecting person, acts like the ring belongs to the person so as to play upon the person's greed when he offers it to them, and then ask for money after the greedy target has accepted the ring). The two targets bluntly told him to "F*ck off", which we both found amusing.
Upon entry to the Musee, I was informed that absolutely no photography was allowed. Completely sick of paying a small fortune to get into these establishments, I proceeded to spend the next few hours taking photos of anything I bloody well felt like. This included paintings by Monet, Degas, and Van Gough to name a few.
The next day we travelled to the Palace at Versailles. Versailles is not far outside of Paris and was easy to walk to from its closest train station.
It didn't take long to clear security before being let into the main part of the Palace, the State Apartments. The French really knew how to decorate a room. Lavish rooms gilded with all kinds of precious metals, different painting styles, amazing furniture. We spent a couple of hours walking through the King's bedrooms, official staterooms, and the apartments of Marie Antoinette. We were disappointed that we couldn't get into the Dauphin's apartments, but oh well - you win some, you lose some. We walked through the famous "Hall of Mirrors", which is lined with - you guessed it - mirrors! The king must have been pretty vain. Even so, it was very lovely to see.
Leaving the main part of the Palace, we headed out into the vast expanses of garden to seek Marie Antoinette's estate at the rear of the palace grounds. It was a bit of a hike, and Zach was disappointed when I was not keen to hire a golf cart with him to drive from the Palace to the Estate.
It took just over half an hour before we arrived at the Grand Trianon, the recreation quarters for the Royal family, and the Petite Trianon, where Marie Antoinette spent much of her time. It's hard to find a space that isn't elaborately decorated on the walls and ceilings.
We left Versailles and headed back into Paris, up to Sacre Coeur and Montmartre where the Basilica of the Sacred Heart of Paris sits. It's a beautifully designed church which becomes even more beautiful at twilight.
We walked to the Moulin Rouge and took some pictures with its facade, before finally heading home for the night.
The next day was our last morning in Paris. We headed to the famous Parisian Catacombs which open near Denfert Rochereau metro station in the South of Paris. Inside the catacombs are the bones of up to six million Parisians who died after contagious diseases such as the plague spread throughout the city hundreds of years ago. Because this was our last day in Paris and we had to catch the Eurostar at 2pm, Zach had the bright idea that we should turn up to the entrance an hour before it opened (as apparently the lines for the catacombs can stretch around the block). We woke up exceedingly early, made our way to Denfert metro station, and lo and behold -
- there was nobody at the catacombs when we arrived. It was another twenty minutes before the second person in line showed up.
The catacombs are about 100 steps underground, and apparently span hundreds of kilometres (though there are only two kilometres open to the public). The bones have been arranged in patterns, most of which make up the walls that line the catacombs, but some are designed in elaborate vaselike formations, or are incorporated into the designs for bone altars for worship and such.
Spooky. It was dark and wet down there, but I'm very glad we did it. It's definitely not for those who are claustrophobic.
London next!
